101 Funny One-Liners Best One-Liner Jokes - Parade Sign up for Scary Mommy's daily newsletter for more stories from the trenches. But now Im not so sure. 34. In fact, its been the inspiration for many a funny meme on every social platform. How do you contact the spirit of a recently deceased window cleaner? Medical One Liners. I do not have a single white note on my piano; my elephant smoked too much. If you want to read more puns about clothes, be sure to check out sock puns and shoe puns. I rang up British Telecom and said: I want to report a nuisance caller. He said: Not you again. Tim Vine, Its amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper. Jerry Seinfeld, I was in my car driving back from work. The Maids Blog, 56 Best Clean(ing) Jokes ideas | humor, funny, bones funny, 160 Cleaning Humor ideas | humor, bones funny, funny quotes, Cleaning Puns Gifts & Merchandise Redbubble, 101 Good, Clean Jokes That'll Make You Laugh Your Pants Off, Clean Jokes You Can Share With Your Family, Here are the cleaning related music puns you didn't Gigwise, Cleaner Jokes: Croker, Chester Amazon.com, Stupell Industries Laundry Wisdom Sign Daily Life Cleaning , big list of clean silly jokes Ducksters, 145 Best Dad Jokes That Will Have the Whole Family Laughing, 16 Posts About Spring Cleaning Thatll Make You Laugh , https://www.scarymommy.com/cleaning-jokes-puns, https://jokesquotesfactory.com/cleaning-jokes-puns/, https://www.maids.com/blog/cleaning-jokes-that-are-actually-funny/, /search?num=20&sxsrf=ALiCzsajhPbLDdlUS-Dhu7-Qaw0MtmIq-w:1656822537832&source=univ&tbm=isch&q=cleaning+puns&fir=zc3wkYSIyiNy9M%252CzVPXqABvzlTVwM%252C_%253BMtL6mbGE_tCGHM%252CwxToNjU-v9agyM%252C_%253BoLV4l7t3dMAWlM%252CsNqaczlTr129pM%252C_%253BpmDYoJjf59UAyM%252CvBY4LYeifYZ_HM%252C_%253BG_sIzYeu5-ByeM%252COldtQREQHpZZkM%252C_%253BKUlCuKamINPshM%252C9mfUybilygRRDM%252C_%253B1Svkj68AnHMD1M%252CwIeiXdKWfLDN_M%252C_%253BCAKxT2ZiqYt3pM%252CBU7WUvLIUURxkM%252C_%253BsODtZTjJDANoTM%252CzVPXqABvzlTVwM%252C_%253BELl3LtqZdwHLDM%252Cxd1ddiU6uegFeM%252C_&usg=AI4_-kRqYjEQ26RTa2z4_O1jRIn16UlC5A&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwjMvsn28Nv4AhXgrJUCHcQoDzQQjJkEegQIJRAC, https://www.pinterest.com/ocedarclean/cleaning-jokes/, https://www.pinterest.com/themaids/cleaning-humor/, https://www.redbubble.com/shop/cleaning+puns, https://dollychar.com/2020/04/cleaning-jokes/, https://www.reddit.com/r/puns/comments/ayj0gb/i_need_cleaning_puns/, https://parade.com/1041830/marynliles/clean-jokes/, https://www.readersdigest.ca/culture/clean-jokes/, https://www.gigwise.com/news/107576/make-music-cleaner-trending-on-twitter-best-music-puns, https://www.amazon.com/Cleaner-Jokes-Chester-Croker/dp/1796218987, https://www.amazon.com/Stupell-Industries-Cleaning-Stephanie-Off-White/dp/B08VCVBGCP, https://www.ducksters.com/jokes/silly.php, https://www.countryliving.com/life/a27452412/best-dad-jokes/, https://www.buzzfeed.com/delaneystrunk/jokes-about-spring-cleaning-twitter-tumblr. Then the kids woke up. 49. Why did the astronaut bring his maid to the ISS (International Space Station)? It was way too cold out tide. I ran out of detergent while I was going to do laundry today. Here are a few examples of his wit and wisdom: Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most. My mother came and told him to fold it as he had promised and not lie on it while he watched TV. It should be: Thou shalt not covet thy neighbours ox except in Scrabble. David ODoherty, How come Miss Universe is only won by people from Earth? Ross Noble, I was watching the London Marathon and saw one runner dressed as a chicken and another runner dressed as an egg. Geology rocks, but geographys where its at. We have a combination of the best laundry one-liners, puns, fashion puns, and clothes puns ready for you. 20. Instead of using fear of prison to discourage criminals, we should make them do laundry using tide pods. What do you call an Italian window cleaner? Prompt and efficient payer. The coach replied, "You're standing too close to the ball after you've hit it.". They would be the real crime detergents. 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You start in a beautiful gown end up cleaning everyone's messes. 27. You look flushed! But my mom encouraged us and said "I am sure it wood work". I guess I turned the tide. I asked him if I liked the unusual design of the roof even though I knew it had gone over his head. 22. Sofa-r, so good. What would you call it if you almost forgot to wash your laundry? The reason those quotes are shared so much is that they are so freaking relatable! My furniture can't communicate with us when we're talking in English. I made a few speaker boxes out of my used laundry detergent bottles. Our lives are made more enjoyable by jokes. Q: Where can ye find a pirate who has lost his. We had to get our vacuum cleaner exchanged. 126 HILARIOUS Art Jokes To Inspire Your Inner Artist! 2023 I washed my clothes today, and a couple of pictures of Santa washed up. Those of you who have teens can tell them clean cleaners janitor dad jokes. These better be funny! From witty one-liners that require some humor to good one-liners to share with kids, these hilarious jokes will make any conversation more lively. I have been working next to the sink in the kitchen all afternoon. 20. Keep smiling and join us on Social, we'd love to have you over. 65. Report. Spending time at home is relaxing, but now, it can also be fun with these house puns, jokes, and one-liners! Realtor sheep like to chill in the baaa-throom. ' Jerry Seinfeld, I was not a particularly small child. In the end, I threw in the towel. From hilarious riddles about daylight saving time to gut-busting one-liners about spring cleaning, this list of jokes and clever puns will tickle just about everyone's funny bone. Light travels faster than sound, which is the reason that some people appear bright before you hear them speak. What should you do if your daughter gets dirty while playing in the mud outside? ", 51. If you liked our suggestions for the best house puns, jokes, and one liners, then why not take a look at these bone puns, or for something other than puns, take a look at our list of the skeleton jokes for kids. So I just requested my dad if he could help me hang the laundry. My mother's sister is quite good at cleaning smelly laundry. Jokes, puns, and one-liners are all forms of art in their own right. 60. 70. What would happen if you found $50 while doing laundry? Cleaning the house fascinates everyone in my family. 50+ Best House Puns, Jokes And One-Liners | Kidadl 25. 33. She hoped the soaps would act as a detergent against future grime. These amazing nurse jokes will give you a good belly laugh. There were so many details to iron out daily. 84. Sistermatic. The world champion tongue twister got arrested. 56. 36. Please accept the terms of our newsletter. Both of us cant look good at the same time, its me or the house. Hes all right now. Found your favourite joke about cleaning? By joining Kidadl you agree to Kidadls Terms of Use and Privacy Policy and consent to receiving marketing communications from Kidadl. Bette Midler, Nothing inspires cleanliness more than an unexpected guest. 4. Nuclear detergents. It'd be a roll tide. We hope you love our recommendations for products and services! More giggles and laughter with this short clean jokes for adults. And its for that reason that he lost his job as chair of the British Book Cover Awards panel. 45. I accidentally spilled quite a lot of laundry detergent. This does not influence our choices. 6) A player asked his golf coach: "What is going wrong with my game?". I took the stairs instead of the elevator today. Houses in London often have cute and colourful doors. What happened to the fly on the toilet seat? My friends bakery burned down last night. When you buy through the links on our site we may earn a commission. 180 Best Dad Jokes of All Time - Funny Dad Jokes - The Pioneer Woman What if there were no hypothetical questions? For all those homebodies, here is a list of some of the best puns and jokes about houses and furniture, which one will make you laugh? 35. 81. There are also cleaners puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls. I wanted her to be the maid, and I wanted to be the guy playing video games. Cleaning ladies are always hiding things you leave out. 45. Here is a list of some home jokes and one-liners that can use to impress your friends and family. Your email address will not be published. I need to give myself time to let that sink in. 03/01/2023. It's Washington DC. After listening carefully, the son replied, Dad, I think its time to throw in the towels., Adult daughter: My house isnt messy. Im reading a book about anti-gravity. But when it gets bad, I take something for it. Ken Dodd, I like to go into The Body Shop and shout out really loud, Ive already got one! Jimmy Carr, I got recognised today in Dixons. 3. It was unfamiliar territory. They really shouldn't have been, because I've worn them before. Tied pods. She only cleans during commercials. Outside work, her interests include music, movies, travel, philanthropy, writing her blog, and reading. All of these jokes for kids and adults are so bad, they're good. My father has schizophrenia, but hes good people. 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Ruby Lou Barnhill, I always clean before the cleaning lady comes. 25. Mark Twain, that prolific witty author who brought to us the delightful tale of Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn, was a quick witted man who seldom kept his opinion to himself! It went inside one ear and out of the other. What are the only rooms without any doors or windows? My sister and I were doing our laundry together. 5. 7. I feel better already! Dave Barry, Its sad day when your child looks up at you and asks: Daddy, is this organic? Organic? Yesterday, my wife injured her back trying to reach for the laundry detergent. Margaret Culkin Banning, Housekeeping is like being caught in a revolving door. 77. Maybe he'll surprise Ree (who has the best mom jokes, we should add). The Beatles wrote one song about laundry detergent and chocolate. 55. It'd be 'Star Wash: Attack Of The Clothes'. I have a few jokes about unemployed people, but none of them work. It has got a strange house-story. It doesnt bother me that Disney has given me unrealistic ideas about love. I always take life with a grain of salt. What we suggest is selected independently by the Kidadl team. 92. We strive to recommend the very best things that are suggested by our community and are things we would do ourselves - our aim is to be the trusted friend to parents. I know they say that money talks, but all mine says is Goodbye.. I hurt myself opening the front door yesterday. It was a mirror-cle. 2. But I know a girl that would get really mad if she heard me say that." De-light is the only household appliance that makes me very happy. 13. So I thought I should start a website about jokes. 7. 21. It was either All or muffin. We chair-ish it. What did the laundry ever do to you? I always say that If you think doing laundry is not funny, you just need to have a dryer sense of humor. Why are goalkeepers good at doing laundry? 28. 30. 7. You are signed up for our newsletter! 91. Famous One Liner Jokes. Not only will this prevent a possible electrical surge, but it will also make it easier to see all the dirt on your screen. Its all right for 10 minutes, then you start to feel sick. Andrew Lawrence, A man walks into a chemists and says: Can I have a bar of soap, please? The chemist says: Do you want it scented? And the man says: No, Ill take it with me now. Ronnie Barker, Hey, if anyone knows how to fix some broken hinges, my doors always open. Paul F. Taylor, People who use selfie sticks really need to have a good, long look at themselves. Abi Roberts, I always take my wife morning tea in my pyjamas. That's why we've rounded-up some of the best spring jokes we've heard to add even more joy to the cheerful time of year. Why wasn't the washing machine starting? I went to the laundromat yesterday with some money. The problem with kleptomaniacs is that they always take things literally. 53 'Squeaky-Clean' Cleaning Jokes To Wash Your Worries Away - Scary Mommy I said that it was a sacrifice for the dryer god. The reception was fantastic. Sorry you missed it! Then the other eyelid. Ken Dodd, I like rice. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said Parking Fine. So that was nice. Tim Vine, Money cant buy you happiness? Using a dry . George Carlin Quotes 1. One day YouTube, Twitter, and Facebook will join together and be called: YouTwitFace; The past, present, and future walked into a bar. My friend found a peanut in her wet laundry. What do sailors do their laundry with? How do you clean Disney World? Someone I know did his Ph.D. in Washing Machines before heading the Washing Machine's PR department. Our collection of funny jokes about cleaning are definitely worth sharing not only to clean freaks but also to your friends, co-workers and kids who are too lazy to do some cleaning! Kids and adults will moan, groan and laugh at these corny puns and one-liners. I went thats me, and he went no, youre that mad bloke off the telly! Lee Mack, 75 of Billy Connollys best jokes, one-liners and quips, You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. So, let's take some time and dive into some great puns. My mom said, "You only have your shelf to blame for this". 41. 89. Enter these funny one-liners. Well, check this out, I bought myself a Happy Meal. Paul F Taylor, A man walked into the doctors. 44. When my dad complained that the plates were dirty, my mom said, "But the cutlery is shining, look on the bright side of knife". By subscribing to this BDG newsletter, you agree to our. Unplug the cord, too, as well as any connected devices. Because he's Anti-Kreese. We couldnt afford a dog. Gary Delaney, You give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Why do basketball players have messy rooms? With an Orlando Broom. 40. The easiest time to add insult to injury is when youre signing someones cast. 6. Will glass coffins be a success? There's a fine line between a numerator and a denominator. Bank Jokes One Liners Clean Bank Jokes Dirty Bank Jokes Bank Jokes for Adults Bank Jokes for Kids Bank Jokes and Puns Final Thoughts on Bank Jokes Best Bank Jokes To lighten your mood and boost your energies, we collected a few best bank jokes. 3. Mushrooms! The guy who invented the other three? And the true, short story of every parent: My house was clean. I love cleaning up messes I didnt make. Things got a little tense. The Italian man could not enter his own house. 11. You know that white thing on his head? You can explore cleaners globally reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Why not try out these one-liners on your friends and family next time you are at home? What would you call a dapper bouncer at the laundromat? ' Tim Vine, I do all the exercises every morning in front of the television up, down, up, down, up, down. A police officer pulled me over and knocked on my window. The man who invented knock-knock jokes should get a no bell prize.