I never knew Ortberg personally. (My family attended when I was in elementary and middle school.) Actually, hugging creates a release of oxytocin (also known as the cuddle hormone) in the human body, which can artificially create a sense of trust and closeness. "[18] In his books, Ortberg has described his own desire for importance and success, and how achieving them did not ultimately bring him happiness. Hybels told her he had taken Ambien to give himself an excuse for not remembering all the wrongs he had done and said to her that night in his room. Menlo Allegations - A record of the allegations against John Ortberg But thats over the course of 42 years of ministry! @ Jack: Captain Cassidy grew up fervently Catholic, converted to the SBC in her teens, and became a Pentecostal shortly afterward. Ortberg's photo. Church elders reprimandedthe Rev. I outlined above the typical reasons people dont mention uncomfortable incidents with someone they trust or admire. We use cookies on our website to give you the most relevant experience by remembering your preferences and repeat visits. Eloquence is a gift from God, but it is only the Holy Spirit working through the folly of proclaiming Christ crucified that ever won a single soul. April 13, 2018. Other WCC members are posting this letter on fb. The important thing is to get people on the bandwagon, and manipulate them to maintain their undying love and loyalty. I have recently become Lutheran. No wonder you have no qualms about slamming the Church, the bride of Christ. 21 For since, in the wisdom of God, the world did not know God through wisdom, it pleased God through the folly of what we preach to save those who believe. He could have retired during the Big 40th celebration and the women could have been supported and validated. I looked down at the author. Status? I am not surprised at all that it will get ugly There are people that are totaly sold out to seeker sensitive approch. It is important to note that sexual attraction to children does not mean that a person will act on that attraction, and one who admits to the attraction and is seeking qualified treatment from an expert, has begun the necessary work. Language links are at the top of the page across from the title. @ Davis and Natasha: And the devil is not after your church, WC. Publishers are pulling back for a reason. I have Every year for many years OT once and NT twice- every year. Nancy is also a Christian pastor. Even our laws in the US lead to punishment o f one chooses to disobey them . There is great peace in being able to say That action was wrong. and not have to decide Is he saved?. Dee, is Julie a new commenter here? To TWW regulars: I am becoming concerned that there will be a full court press by some people. @ Headless Unicorn Guy: Cliffe also said she spoke with Johnny Ortberg, trying to convince him to end his volunteer work and to seek treatment. Their view of the person is completely undermined by the experience. Why is it people cannot just go to work,college, etc, without the social safety net of artificial group belonging? Ok whats wrong with this picture?? He was born on May 5, 1957, in Rockford, Illinois, United States of America. Perhaps its just honest ignorance, perhaps its denial. If WC folds, its a clear indication. It all led me to focus on several things with the kids:. If you continue to use this site we will assume that you are happy with it. Everyone who is still there from the elders to the lowliest either thinks like this or doesnt dare open their mouth. Or perhaps some women get hugged one way or the other disproportionately for one reason or the other and therefore complain or not about hugging-ness. There was also some sort of one world conspiracy deal. @ Lydia: Later I did not know how or who to talk to and began to second-guess and doubt myself as to its significance; that is, until years later when I began to hear stories of other similar encounters. By your own philosophy of hugging then i would assume that the women who are complaining about Hybels hugging behavior also know the difference and therefore they are utterly correct in their objections to his behavior. The lawyer they hired had no experience whatsoever in dealing with church-based abuse, and remarkably he did not ever actually speak to any of the children or parents at the church, only with ministry staff and workers. He sees things.. How can you say to your brother, Brother, let me take the speck out of your eye, when you yourself fail to see the plank in your own eye? RE got to talking about guys grabbing a boobie feel with side hugs; she thinks it is pretty ubiquitous in the male population. Back then, they complained about PC(USA) not being hardcore enough about salvation for King Them and caring too much about social justice. Sigh. John Ortberg Education. They were belittled and mocked if they tried to set boundaries or said they preferred not to be hugged. The worst that often has happened is some vague mumbled half-apology or copping to a general misunderstanding. I bought pants, shirts, belts and sweaters and you picked what you wanted and paid me for those items. Amen! The Body does not put its faith in humans, even celebrity ones. You bet it will get nasty.. He thought that his brother had been avoiding him because hes trans, and yes, that seems to have been part of the problem, but in reality it seems mostly to have been because Lavery was literally the only person in the familywho didnt know about Johnnys big problem. Tao, who is 18, told RNS in a series of emails that he had seen tweets on social media about his former coach and called them quite unbelievable. A team member for four years, he said he never saw any inappropriate conduct. Get this straight. It is hard enough fighting rampant sex abuse in churches. The fact that people post here and not just give up on the church and Christainty gives me great comfort the NT clearly warns of false profits amoung the brethern and clearly teaches we should have qualified leaders. And why on earth is this even a discussion? How hard is it for men to keep their hands off women in the work environment? He then shared unfiltered thoughts about me, describing in great detail specific parts of my body he liked, and said he thought I was effusive, sexy and had great candor, mentioned what a promising leader I was, and he said. @ Julie: This is my church and I dont think there are any loliests but there are people who want a full accounting. Wild!!! In response, he prayed with the volunteer and sent him on his merry way with a counseling referral. but 4 YEARS went by, even after John Ortberg tried to have the Willow Elders handle this 4 years Nancy Ortberg still didnt speak out. He does not know if there was any misconduct at Menlo Church. debuted at #3 on the New Release chart[5] at Amazon.com.[6]. It works but is it the faith? John Ortberg III informed Daniel Lavery, Ortberg's estranged daughter, who currently identifies as a transgender male, of his attraction to minors on Nov. 15, 2019. Be nice and your comments will be let through. Then his son blew the whistle. Soon as your back was turned, the mask flipped off like a light switch and there was only the contempt of the Predator gloating over the stupidity of his Prey. And actually, it was the Holy Spirit that empowered Peter to be so bold that made it happen. That isnt what I was talking about and I should have clarified. Learn to value yourself. And thats a dangerous, dangerous situation for any parent who has a child in that congregation.. I have been doing this for 9 years and that is jus plain baloney. The similarities in these womens stories were striking. Redemption is just that; a snatching away from utter separation from God and a second chance-sometimes a chance to bring down the idolatrous temple of a strange god and die in the process while you stand there blind and in shackles-but restored by God. Ask yourself If we are to judge on actions that are listed as sin or are considered crimes, then what does this really mean. Walking away from an institution is not the same as walking away from faith in Christ. John Ortberg Under Fire Again, This Time for Hiding Son's Identity That is not old school. 331-3030. Working our works out of view, I believe her account. More of my thoughts here: http://www.divorceminister.com/nancy-ortberg-shares-her-side-rebill-hybels-allegations/. Looks like THAT Joseph Smith (the founding couple) were lucky enough to have a Brigham Young (the board) to succeed them. So much for their Christian wittiness, huh? Assuming that Ms. Walle isnt lying whatever her tone or motives Ortberg could go first and model real manhood by addressing her claims directly, owning what is true, and asking for forgiveness, as warranted. May God raise up more people like Josiah who tore down the high places and every high thing that exalted itself against the knowledge of God until Jesus becomes the only thing worshipped in the church. They often feature welcoming committees, guides, decent signage around their churches, and tons of features and amenities for members. I see this is a crucial issue, and I appreciate that Dee has put it forward for consideration in abuse survivor communities. To fellowship with other believers? Ho old is John Ortberg? Then the man of God acts as if nothing happened.. Give me the bellicose jerks any time. The Spirit works, sometimes over decades, with friends and acquaintances. Has anyone complained about inappropriate behavior from John Ortberg? John Ortberg Resigns. Why I Feel Compassion for This Family: Lord Have This is mainly from his career as a Christian author and evangelist. So, Ive also read it in the Original Languages. One does not mess with God and get away with it. The whole church is in our thoughts and prayers. This will sound horrible to some but I never understood the overall hug culture. Some until their death beds. predatory, calculated and manipulative all with a facade of kindness and mentoring. I believed, everyone believed, that he was one of the good guys, committed to fighting for womens rights, committed to our marriage, and to the women he worked with. But one thing I know, we have a choice in our behaviors. Sounds like wing ding anti Semitic tripe. If it doesnt recur, people often try to dismiss it as an aberration. Brad, given my age, their is a high probability that I was taking college bible class before you were born. Take responsibility for your actions and the role you played! Lavery was also concerned that his brother invoked the phrase virtuous pedophile to describe himself a term used by an online support group of people attracted to children who never act on that attraction and who maintain that abuse is wrong. I have heard sermons on the side hug. In the book, Turn the Ship Around David Marquet writes: Leadership should mean giving control rather than taking control and creating leaders rather than forging followers. Power is at the top but information is with the hands-on bottom levels of a hierarchy. Not one. Honest to Pete until this very discussion I thought that this was just the way that decent people behave. How can leadership send an OPINION to the entire congregation? He has published several books including the 2008 ECPA Christian Book Award winner When the Game is Over, It All Goes Back in the Box. Willow Creek is its own worst enemy not Satan. What if the Elders had sent Hybels home on a sabbatical while they allowed for a truly independent investigation 5 years ago? Woe to the one who quarrels with his Maker An earthenware vessel among the vessels of earth! Tell your sister that I am standing with her in spirit and in prayer. We would use the suite for meetings, as well as gatherings for medical professionals. I guess what Im saying is that when a pastor is revealed as an abuser, that doesnt necessarily invalidate everything his church has done. The information given was half-truths and from the very first email sent out from the elderslacking wisdom and discernment. Other publications include; The Life Youve Always Wanted, which has sold more than 500,000 copies as of 2008. Yes, there is a hug/cuddle culture that has science backing it. Interview by Joe Carter | September 18, 2012 Image: 2009 de Polo Photography My former abusive, cultish and abuser-friendly church was positively obsessed with unity. The pastor preached on it continually. Or even an outlier, if need be. And once thats done, the only way to survive is to seize the throne Myself. Have you read the stories of the great persecutions of the early church. This timeline will become important in a moment. Laura has written for The New York Times, New York Magazine, and BuzzFeed. The contents might be encrypted, and, if a key used to decrypt them is lost (or not handed over), they arent readable. It is in the section entitled, An inquiry begins, about halfway down the page. A high five or handshake can do the same. If you note, the hotel rooms in these narratives were suites and meetings were being held in those rooms. Glory to God. I believe that God is convicting WCCs leadership. I hope you are right about this. This is about strange behavior which was tolerated because one guy knew how to build a church and bring in money. Sit under Jesus Christs leadership in the future. Shortly afterward, Lavery threatened to go public with his knowledge if his dad didnt start taking it seriously. I truly hope that WCC reexamines who they are. John Ortberg (Goodreads Author) 4.03 avg rating 9,432 ratings published 1997 40 editions. He had been volunteering at Menlo Church as a youth leader and coach until about 2020. @ Deborah: It never appeared that they were the type of people that would not speak up. I am absolutely sickened by this situation. This has not only damaged women but also affected men, like my husband, who looked up to Bill Hybels as a positive role model. He is a married man who shares his romantic relationship with his wife Nancy. Not my thing. I am so very proud of her and with how hard this has been on everyone. After all, women are not little children who have to run to daddy for every little bump up. I have seen it for over 20 years. She claims Bill Hybels brought up the incident in Hawaii about the ambien. Is it not I, the LORD? And everyone wants to work there. John Ortberg preaches at Menlo Church in May 2020. This is part of the problem that the #metoo movement does not address. Final note: Clancys daughter, Rev Clancy, pastors a PC(USA) church. It legitimately creates automatic suspicion, and potential legal woes. Menlo Church / YouTube / Screenshot. Once again, power is used to disrespect and mistreat others thereby inflicting invisible but very real, very painful wounds. Obviously very biblically ignorant site!! This is going to be a really . I was in the bath and my roommate answered the phone. Ruth Haley Barton, formerly of Willow Creek and trained at the very contemplative Shalem Institute for Spiritual Formation in Washington D.C., wrote Invitation to Solitude and Silence, and teaches contemplative prayer through her Transforming Center. Id just as soon do away with megas altogether, and I doubt anybody would even try either, but it might be better than placing the popularity of a church on a single person. No one walks away unascathed. Please bear with me. His wife had died rapidly of inflammatory breast cancer and we were at the funeral home for visitation. Brad Brucker wrote: He missed an important element in his effort at damage control: Preach it straight from the beginning. But, the cat is out the bag. We only hear about the ones dumb enough to slip up and get caught! havent forgotten. Daniel's thread included . He is met with a standing ovation and a promised time to honor him and his family. i.e. Ok whats wrong with this picture?? Where I work we are required to use the company secure email system if sending high or moderate risk information (e.g., social security numbers, credit card numbers, student records, health information). As for BIll HybelsI have not judged his salvation. After all that Nancy Ortberg said, I would hate for her husband to have behaved like that, even if it isnt as bad as what Bill Hybels has done. Some will walk away all together from their faith journey. @ dee: Brad, not all of us read or study the scriptures with the same filter. The lawyer closed the investigation around Christmas, and all that really happened was that John Ortberg got reprimanded by his elders and forced to go through that song and dance farce ofrestoration. There will be a full court press to save Hybels legacy. Sometime in the next two weeks, I am going to write a story about a woman who was raped by her husband. Is faith journey a synonym for sanctification? @ okrapod: Lavery hoped the two could reconcile. That was the exact thought I had while walking the dog this morning! They said they could look him in the eye and discern if he was telling the truth.. And that was very painful.. Now, if we mean that believers at Willow Creek (or outside of it) will grapple with Mr Hybels and the Elders sins in these matters as they themselves become more sanctified, I can see that perspective. So, Am I over thinking it?, one wonders. Old school stuff. Same play book. A quick glance at google and apparently hugging is drugging when it comes to the brain. John & Nancy Ortberg are known to be false teachers, mis-leading the body of Christ teaching unbiblical things such as contemplative prayer which amounts to nothing other than New Age mysticism. Shortly before the publication of Something That May Shock and Discredit You, Lavery's father John Ortberg was suspended from the Bay Area evangelical church where he ministered. This caliber of leaders dont just stay quiet. MyPayPal is captain_cassidy@yahoo.com(thats an underscore in there) for one-time tips. She described the whole situation as profoundly sad. @ AbuseCrusher: The most frequent promise in the Bible is I will be with you.. Exit music: Serving whom? We would often rent out suites in hotels when there were medical conferences/ conventions going on. Its hard to tell what I havent read. The gospel includes that in spite of what happened God is willing to forgive and restore the sinner in relationship to God. So sad. If it is seeing a good friend after a long time, a family member, etc, understandable. No one walks away unascathed. When will people get it that the church is not the same thing as the body of Christ. I hope your eyes are one day opened. You can do a lot more damage with one Suggestion in the right place than a dozen Fireballs. All we can do is obey the Lord, do whatever it is were told by Him to do. You are right, the whole situation smells of cover-up. The issue with those who had represented themselves before God and man as being in a place of spiritual authority with the responsibility to be above reproach often have escaped civil or criminal conviction or any sort of permanent admission of guilt or shortcoming for which repentance is called. I pray. Even the word Unity really means conformity. He told me to sit down and put my feet up. Speaking generally, a person who discloses sexual attraction to children should not be employed to work with children or permitted to volunteer with children, she told RNS in an email. Please understand that this is exactly the way it usually happens. The FAQ document she links, however, entitled Willow Creek Response to Local Media, has mysteriously transformed itself into a 404 NOT FOUND message. Gossip! They had a big schism over LGBT equality in 2013, with the denomination deciding to stand on the right side of history. Rats gnawing cables in two; . Be the one who is loving and kind in the midst of sorrow, showing us that you trust Jesus to bring something beautiful out of this pain. Agreed that Ms. Walles claims arent relevant to the question of Mr. Hybels actions, although they do speak to a toxic, boundary-less culture where men were apparently not held to high standards and did not have clear guidelines that held them accountable. Hybels chief goal seems to have been to get his sexual needs met without negotiation. Just a followup to my above comment. I dont want to think poorly of John Ortberg too. : God Has Placed before You an Open Door. What we have a problem with is a man who by his own admission did a lot of untoward things, things that are the very definition of a sexual groomer, and did so behind the scenes while maintaining the aura of one who should be emulated. Personally I was more offended by Wailing Wall-Satanic ritual connection. Jesus wins. The Trans Man, the Pedophile and the Pastor - Medium But nothing in a church or in a family stays hidden forever. Get that through your heads. The Kingdom of God is not massive corporate structures and clever corporate game plans. By. The door was open. WC is Hybels no matter how much they protest. Standing Ovations: Whats the Difference Between Highpoint Church and Willow Creek Community Church, Some Thoughts on Supposedly Feminist Men Who Reportedly Abuse/Harass Women | futuristguy, http://www.divorceminister.com/nancy-ortberg-shares-her-side-rebill-hybels-allegations/, https://vondadyer.weebly.com/blog/vonda-dyers-statement-re-chicago-tribune-and-bill-hybels, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sa0EtdtPi8w, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hv72Q23lIp0, https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=bKkOke2noyc, https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=FLT3Cb96-Mk, https://www.lighthousetrailsresearch.com/blog/?p=28151%5D, https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Serpent_seed. Also, John authored the 2002 Christianity Today Book Award winner titled If You Want to Walk on Water, Youve Got to Get Out of the Boat. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. she either did or didnt inform her husband immediately 1. Instead, Ortberg, the lead pastor of Menlo, kept what he had learned about the volunteer secret from his congregation. *Bill also admitted that the woman alleging an affair had spent many nights at the Hybels home when Lynne was out of town.* (from the Nancy Ortberg post). And yes, I cuddled our dog as a little girl. My bad for not being back in touch with you. And, no, it does not minimize their words concerning what Bill Hybels has done. So sad. . Gosh, what a champion for children! The cookie is set by GDPR cookie consent to record the user consent for the cookies in the category "Functional". Wherever my story takes me, however dark and difficult the theme, there is always some hope and redemption, not because readers like happy endings, but because I am an optimist at heart. Pew sitters paid for these seminars Lydia, not sure if that is sarcasm or? Also, Daniel wrote Slates Dear Prudence advice column from 2016 to 2021. And yes I tend to paint with a broad brush because the structures and systems involved demand it. Exactly. Lavery had reported a congregant's confession of "obsessive sexual feelings about young children" to Pastor Ortberg, who encouraged that person to continue . I dont think Jesus sees things the same way they do. Tysvm Dee. there will be a pendulum swing away from megachurches. These are the things that The Church has to wake up to. : In every way he could, he kept this information quiet. For the measure you use, it will be measured to you. With the way some are acting, they mimic Hybels anger and vindictiveness rather than Christ. Buy my books, listen to my sermons, attend my conferences! Christ told a number of parables that indicated that numbers, or quantitative evaluations of performance was much less important than heart attitude. Ortberg denied. Yes, we left HBC ourselves. When youre the victim of something creepy, such as abuse, suggestive sexual behavior or private narcissistic rage or whatever ugly thing from a pastor who holds himself up as a paragon of virtue, people often feel embarrassed at having been involved in it, even if they had nothing to do with the wrongful actions. @ dee: We are talking about someone very well paid to teach Jesus and model that teaching. They were powerful, influentual, respected leaders. Bill Hybels touched me, hugged me invited me to his room I left then went to my hotel room and cried.. You would think that wannabe preacher boys would be warned off of that in seminary. The trusting person is the dupe who was groomed to respond accordingly. I dont have any memory of doing and saying those things to her that night!. And conveniently you are dismissing the affair. That is a mistake. teaching other churches how to impliment the Williow Creek model. . Ok. However, for people like those profiled on this site who have fallen short in protecting those under their charge (say, by covering ups their own misdeeds and/or crimes or those of others) to reemerge in a place where they again wish to wield spiritual authority (by starting another ministry (sic) in which they assume spiritual leadership or selling books advising sheep on spiritual matters seeking funding from said sheep in each case) is massively troubling. But one thing I know, we have a choice in our behaviors. If you all think that personal shopping is sex abuse, you need to get real. I love Diane Langberg. I have other views about resigning rock star pastors but wont go into it now. And it would appear that apparently absolutely no one found the need/necessity of bringing poor pastoral attitude, grave scriptural issues, his response, and certain questionable pastoral behavior before the church as directed by scripture. She was still hoping that he had changed. Bill also admitted that the woman alleging an affair had spent many nights at the Hybels home when Lynne was out of town. Refuse to settle for eloquent lechers. From 1985 to 1990, John served as senior pastor at Simi Valley Community Church. Im not saying any of that is right. Betrayal, trust, etc. Are you saying that letter posted was well written? I read it Daily and Journal too. I know, Ive been there. You are just nailing it. At what point did Nancy inform her husband? 21 views, 1 likes, 0 loves, 1 comments, 1 shares, Facebook Watch Videos from Cargill United Methodist Church: Preparing Our Hearts for Worship Welcome.